Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Can I borrow the car Dad?

A: Nope!


Q: Does my butt look big in these jeans?

A: What you want to hear; Not at all, you look mighty fine babe

   The truth; When I look at you, I keep hearing reverse beepers and seeing Wide Load signs.


QYOU; God what is the meaning of life?

AGOD; Did you checkout my FaceBook page?


Q: What is the phobia of chainsaws called?

A: Common sense.


Q: What two things can you never eat for breakfast?

A: Lunch and Dinner.


Q: What color is a mirror?


Q: If you enjoy wasting time, is that time really wasted?


Q: What does procrastination mean?

A: I will tell you later.


Q: How big is the Specific Ocean?

A: Can you be more Pacific?


Q: Why are babies so ugly when they are born?

A: How about you stay underwater for 9 – 10 months then squeeze yourself through a hole the size of a golf ball and get slapped on the arse at the end and see how you look.


Q: Does Vodka really kill Bees and Wasps?

A: Yes, over time, it will destroy their liver but it’s the disruption to their family and home life that really takes a toll.


Q: What is worse, Ignorance or Apathy?

A: I don’t know and I don’t care.


Q: What % of water is celery?

A: Water is zero % celery.


Q: How do I turn off caps lock?

A: I HAVE THE SAME QUESTION.